Be Real... and Grow!

People often ask me how I lost ninety pounds, what did I do that was so special. Did I change my eating habits? Yes.  Did I exercise? Yes. I did all those things, but most importantly; I was real. The excuses were cut out, I couldn’t create anymore actually. Getting to this point was hard, we love our excuses AND I have really good ones: 1. I am too tired or busy to work out(work, kids, cleaning, painting something, etc.) not that some aren’t legitimate, but there are a lot of hours in the day!  2. I will start (dieting, exercising) Monday. Why always Monday? Why not now? What makes Monday magical? Are we going to love it anymore on Monday? I  think not.  3. My knees, back, hip, head, throat hurt. Yes, they probably do. You are ninety pounds overweight! I am not trying to make light of this, but when I think back on all of the ways I bamboozled myself, I can’t help but laugh. I made the weight bigger than me(excuse the pun), if I didn’t see instant results I would just give up, I wasn’t ready to put in the work, hence the excuses and then the guilt. Oh the guilt; it takes on a life of its own, and why do we feel guilt?  When the reality is; we are doing just what we want, for good or bad, it IS what we want, it is our choice. That can be a harsh reality and it does require being honest and real with yourself and once started; it flows into every area of your life.  It is one of  The greatest gifts we can give ourselves; this whole honesty thing.  Acceptance,  Approval  and Honesty are required for change. Make it happen, no excuses.

Tags: Weight loss, wellness

It's okay

I woke up feeling heavy, not physically; mentally. November 11TH, my beloved, deceased mothers birthday. Do you know that feeling when you are about to go to the "Bad place" and you keep fighting it, doing everything you can not to feel, to keep it moving, to be happy. So, on this day I decided to embrace my sadness, no more talking myself out of it. I could have crying jags if I want( even in front of people!), I would allow "Fit throwing", toss a few pillows, lay out on the floor and kick and scream, etc., watch bad television while lying in bed drinking copious amounts of wine and mumbling ABOUT how bad t.v is, but the most important part to my plan: I was going to allow myself to grieve. I didn't run from my pain( I also didn't throw a fit), sometimes people will make you feel as if you must rush through a painful situation, so the healing process can begin. Not realizing that the pain IS part of the healing process, so own it, just don't wallow in it. I lived and coped with my day the way my mother would have: I didn't stay in the bed, I did go to work and allowed myself to be open to my clients, I didn't just go through the motions. They, in turn, brought me happiness. I did light a candle, do my Yoga, and am now writing to you. Being sad doesn't mean we don't appreciate life, it doesn't mean you aren't grateful, but you do need a second, a moment to regroup and refresh.  Be happy or sad, embrace both.

Fit2bFree!: Watch your words

Fit2bFree!: Watch your words: As a woman there isn't anything worse than being called fat, you can call us anything else, but make a mean comment about our weight and you...

Watch your words

As a woman there isn't anything worse than being called fat, you can call us anything else, but make a mean comment about our weight and you bring us to our knees. Now, some will deny this and say that being called the B-word is way worse, and I will agree, but people call each other the B-word all day. In fact, sometimes it's used as a term of endearment( as sick as that is). But call someone fat; and watch their whole countenance change. All day long they (women mostly) will ask every friend they have if she looks fat: "Do you think I am fat?", "Do I look fat in this?" we drive ourselves and everyone else crazy. I know, because I was she, you know, Her, that girl that asked all the time "Do I look fat?" when the reality was that I already knew the answer; I did. That doesn't stop you from hoping that someone will say you don't look fat, that you are all right, that you are great the way you are.  I watched a t.v show tonight that is based on an overweight young lady trying to get her life and weight on track. This girl is sweet and kind and takes care of her sick mother, who wouldn't want a friend or daughter like this? As I watched this show I saw her be openly discriminated against because of her weight, taunted and called "Fat B" This girl went from being happy most of the time to someone that couldn't stop crying, didn't want to leave her house at all because of something some idiotic strangers said to her. That show brought all of my memories back; being taunted while jogging " HEY! MOVE YOUR FAT ASS!", While eating:"Really? Are you going to eat ALL of that?" Even by doctors: " I just don't get it! How do your ankles hold you? they are so small" Yeah, that was said. Well meaning family members(did you hear the sarcasm?) make you terrified to be at family functions because of their snide and hateful comments. Let me clue everyone in on something: Fat people KNOW they are fat. They don't need your stares, comments, meanness, etc. If you are not there to restore, respect, or relate, walk away. I was saddened by this show, it proved that no matter how enlightened we believe we are, how smart, funny, beautiful, one little word still has that much power, and we ALL buy in. I am about to step off my box... but before I do, and read this slowly: Be Kind, it costs you nothing. Be compassionate, you will be blessed for it. Stand up for someone who can't stand up for themselves because they were never taught and you will be a Hero, and don't we all need one? Peace. 

Why We Exercise

I have a client that hates to exercise, no, I mean REALLY hates to workout, but has no problem dieting. Her logic is that she can lose the same amount of weight just dieting and not have to exercise; so I gave an assignment: Don't see me for two weeks, keep a strict diet, and just... chill. She couldn 't believe it! I was willing to give up income and be proven wrong!? Well, I knew      ( from experience) that my little experiment would be in my favor. I wanted her to see that: Yes, you can lose the weight, BUT! when you exercise with a diet that isn't extreme, that actually follows... wait I am about to say it, the Food Pyramid! Your body will tone beautifully, you will shed water weight like crazy, and your attitude will be so much better. The "experiment"  worked, she saw that though the weight was getting lost, with every pound lost there was stretchy skin that had once been tightening up. She noticed that her energy levels had dropped greatly, skin was lackluster, and clarity low. She figured it out! What we all know, exercise matters. It can change not only your body, but your LIFE! It is why we do what we do, every day, and why she is STILL my client. 

For the Beautiful and Alone....

Young, smart, beautiful, employed, fit, and.... Alone! How many do you know that fit this description? I recently joined a very popular, expensive, dating network( it shall remain nameless) and after four hours of filling out my profile and all that I want in a partner, etc. and blah, blah, blah; I get a little message that informs me that I am SO special that finding a "better half" to my "Best Half" will be a challenge for them! WHAT!!? WHAT AM I PAYING YOU FOR!? To repeat what my mama used to say!? That only someone "Special" would love me?! It was such a lovely way to let me down gently, how could I be upset.. but I was! Heck, I want to hold hands! I want to skip through fields and crap! But then I thought about what they were saying, I AM special! No People, in a good way, thank you very much! There is absolutely nothing the matter with me, just as there is nothing the matter with you.   I am turning this into a "lift a candle and wave it " moment; but, in my rush to date and trip the light fantastic( what DOES that mean!?) I have kissed some frogs, gotten hurt feelings, and been DD( disgusted and disappointed) to the point where I had this impenetrable wall around me. The wall is the bad place, it is a waste of time and energy, but most of all; it doesn't work.  I need to be patient, I will let Mr. Special find me for once and "trip the light fantastic" ( I still don't know what it means, but I like how it sounds) with friends and.. Me. I happen to like me in all my Special-ness :) Be Patient my friends, set your standards and KEEP to them, write down all the things you love about yourself, instead of focusing on all that you dislike, and you will attract what you like! Expect the BEST and you will get the best, because you DESERVE it.  Now put your candles down before you burn you hand....
Peace :)

Choose... You.

Often times we believe that if we put ourselves first, we are being selfish, in fact aren’t we raised to believe that? That is not the type of selfish I mean here; I am not talking about being so selfish that you neglect family and responsibilities or being just a jerk that won’t do for others. I am talking about putting some things aside, so that You can have me time. Yes, the elusive Me time, who ever really has it? Between work, children, errands, did I say work?! Me time has become an urban legend, something people talk about in whispers and dark rooms, no, seriously! Who gets Me time? I’ll tell you who; Smart People.  Yup, that’s what I said: Smart People! Smart people know that without Me time, they get sick from overwork and stress. Smart people know that they have to find the time to exercise to keep healthy, even if it’s five in the morning( I know, that’s painful). Most importantly; Smart people know that Me time is just that, ME TIME! and it is whatever makes you happy: a manicure, sitting in front of your computer, reading a book, or just sitting doing nothing, it is your time. Time for you to get your thoughts in order, or not have a thought at all. Make time for Me time and recharge your mind and spirit.