"You can't heal in the place that made you sick."
Unknown
Have you made some changes? I need you to know that any adjustment, big or small, is progress. If you have read my other blogs in this series, you know that I know that change is not easy. You will have push back. You will, at times, have shaky legs, but you can survive this. Not only survive but also thrive! Our goal here is to not constantly rehash the past. It is to see a future where you approve of yourself and feel comfortable in your own skin. Let's do some work.
"Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love"
Karolina Kurkova
Are you safe with yourself? It is an odd question, I know. It is also a question we rarely ask ourselves. We tend to focus on how others treat us, now I want you to look at how you treat yourself. What is your personal love language? Have you created a safe space for yourself to heal?
"I approve of myself"
"I am safe"
"I am loved, loving and lovable"
Affirm yourself. Affirmations are so important! I can't say it enough or write it enough. Looking outside of ourselves for approval is very dangerous. Why? Happiness comes from within. Self-worth is not found in the crowd, only we can give ourselves that. When we look outside of ourselves for love, caring, approval(especially coming from a dysfunctional family)we put ourselves in situations where we will always work against our self-interests. There is no doubt that this is "moving differently" for a lot of us, but if you have started doing the work, keep going! Be proud for following through and being an advocate for yourself. Say them with me:
"I approve of myself"
"I am safe"
"I am loved, loving and lovable"
"We ignore seeing the truth for temporary happiness"
But are you happy? It might sound dramatic to some, but when I was still believing I could heal surrounded by the same people who hurt me, I was never happy! In fact, I was resentful and passive-aggressive, these are all facts. When I look back at my younger self, there are no judgments and I don't want you to judge yourself. It takes time and patience with self to clean this up, give yourself this gift. I won't give you too much homework to do! Start with the affirmations, create your boundaries, incorporate deep breathing throughout your day, and be ready for your healing. See and speak your truth because you are worthy! Remember: "We are only as blind as we want to be." Maya Angelou and when you want to heal, the truth ain't pretty most times, but it will set you free.
Repeat after me:
"I approve of myself"
"I am safe"
"I am loved, loving and lovable"
Wishing you all love and peace, but mostly peace!
