I believe that everyone has a story; good or bad, we have a story to tell. There is nothing wrong with this; until we realize that we keep telling the same stories, and they are usually sad. Be real, how many people do you know that tell happy stories about their childhood? Past relationships? If you can name five, I am impressed! We talk and talk about the negative, who did what to us, when and where it happened and who didn't or did take our side. We talk so much about the bad it starts to define who we are as people. Even when we try to feel happiness, it is as if our happiness is muted. That black cloud of negativity is hanging over us, leaching the bright colors from our landscape; which is Life.
I sigh as I write this, only because I remember feeling this way and not understanding why I couldn't break the sadness, "Cope" better as one person told me to do. Why did everyone else seem to be able to move on and live, at least decently, and not me? I know that some of the people I spoke with had gone through similar situations as me growing up: Emotional neglect, physical and sexual abuse and yet they seemed happy. So, I started to do a little investigation, I wanted to know what they were doing! How is it possible that you can be happy with ALL that has happened to you? Tell me... now! I was aggressive in my research and this is what I found: It isn't that they just "got over it" that doesn't happen. What does happen is that you stop talking about what was. These happy people stopped holding the perpetrators secrets, giving them more power. They focused on healing, they focused on loving themselves and being grateful to have come through the fire. These Happy people stopped telling the stories that bound them to anger, shame and emptiness. Because these stories no longer defined who or what they are. We, and now I can include myself with the Happy People, understand that secrets and sad stories not told in the light and then released will shackle you. Find and be grateful for all that you have loved in your life. It is not always easy, patterns can be difficult to break; but it is so worth it. There is so much to love, so much to see, without that dark cloud over your head dimming all the beautiful lights and colors. :)
Be Well
